also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
