Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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