The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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