i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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