My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize