i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just found puke in my bra..
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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