i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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