mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
