my phone needs a breathalizer
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
So vagazzling was a success
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize
