i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know