I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
You can't special order awesome
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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