Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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