if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Life is so much better after having sex.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
