No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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