she woke up with a sticky ear
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
