It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
