Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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