Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
