She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize