So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
