now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I understand Curling. That high.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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