Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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