he puts the penis in happiness.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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