Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
