I want to make a zoo with you.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
