so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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