I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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