I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Randomize
