Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
