If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
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