The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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