Just cropdusted the office
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize