i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
