i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
