Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
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