i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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