My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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