oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I just googled if crying burns calories
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
