dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
