Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
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We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
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Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah