You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?