I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize