two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
He has the fingertips of a God
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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