dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
