when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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