Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The beer is more important than you right now.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
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