do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
