Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
