seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
