I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
