Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize