; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize