guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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